I’ve had a humbling few days, then again, it is always good to be reminded of the power of God.
The sadly average visit
I recently met with someone struggling with grief. I had reached out to them knowing their situation and they were happy to schedule a visit, it was a few weeks out so I had time to prepare mentally and emotionally and to cover the meeting with prayer. I prayed quite a bit about the meeting. I prayed the person would be vulnerable and open (they were), that I would have something helpful to say (I didn’t), that the meeting would help them get closer to Jesus (I have no idea), that at the least they would know they are not alone and that the church wants to be there for them (I suppose this was accomplished).
In the end everything went fine, very average, which is to say, I can only hope the other person found my listening useful because I had precious little to say and their profound grief was like a mountain and my bit was like moving a spoonful of dirt for them.
So often this is what pastoral care is like, but we do it because no one deserves to be alone and just because our help is limited does not mean it is useless or unwelcome. As Christians we hope and pray that our offerings will be deeper and spirit-infused and so helpful.
Consoling someone by the power of the Spirit
Also, recently someone I know has gone through a terribly difficult (and frankly unfair) time. We made no plan to meet, we just happened to cross paths and have lunch in a room full of people together, I did nothing to prepare.
They have been working through it as best they can and been very pro-active about it but even so progress is slow and hard-won and far from linear. I will not write more about their challenge, it their story.
I listened, having no idea what to say but trusting that listening was enough. As they spoke a familiar warmth came to me. They looked to me to respond and I said, “I am not psychologist but…” and what came out felt so right to me I knew it was the Holy Spirit speaking through me what my friend needed to hear. So much so, perhaps this is a sign of the Spirit’s work, I could not tell you how I finished that sentence even a day after the event.
To my surprise (and relief lest I be turning into some kind of spirited weirdo) they were greatly consoled, it was as if my words had unlocked a puzzle and suddenly disparate shapes they were struggling to make any sense of moved into place and created a picture. I could see it on their face, I could see it in how they suddenly breathed better, how their shoulders changed posture. They still have a long long road ahead, but I am certain the Holy Spirit is meeting them along the way and moving powerfully in their life.
I am so grateful for such moments.
I wish I could share more about this one or teach people how to make them happen, but I cannot even make them happen in my life (see first visit).
All I can say is a word of encouragement to be attentive to the Spirit moving in you and giving you words, be bold in the saying of them, and notice the moment you are in and how God may be seeing fit to use you. Should you be involved in this sort of thing a lot, I would simply add that every effort is worthwhile.
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